Liquor at Walgreens is the ultimate throw your hands up in defeat gift.
We get it. You suck at shopping so you’re just going to buy everyone booze. Honestly, that’s a great idea. If bottles of booze replaced socks and sweaters, the world would be a better, albeit colder place. Plus, you don’t have to go to the fancy pants liquor store to get it either. Livers don’t care if you buy liquor at Walgreens or the distillery. It’s the spirit that counts.
With that in mind, we’ve cruised aisles upon aisles of liquor at Walgreens in Chicago to find the best options for your family this year. Some are box sets because free stuff is awesome. Others are great options if you want to pretend it’s something special. There’s even one that we can’t recommend strongly enough that you avoid at all costs.
Belvedere 007 Spectre Shaker & Bottle
Everyone loves Bond, and you can pretend that’s why you bought this limited edition Belvedere Spectre Shaker gift pack for them. Find GoldenEye in the 99¢ bin at Best Buy, and you’ve got yourself a nice little boozy package.
Glenlivet 12 Gift Pack
Glenlivet 12 is the benchmark for a good scotch, and this one happens to be accompanied by to glasses ergonomically designed for your pleasure. The box is also fake signed, so it’s probably worth a fortune.
Bookers – Oven Buster Batch
Any bottle of Bookers will do, but their quarterly limited releases are truly something special. This one is named for the time Booker Noe’s wife threw some Bookers over a roast and nearly blew the door of the oven. Probably don’t try that this Christmas though.
New Amsterdam Gift Set with Playing Cards
I prefer Amsterdam’s older stuff, but you’re going to need entertainment in addition to alcohol to survive the holidays. That makes playing cards the perfect addition to a gift set. As someone who does magic for kids in hospitals, I know you can never have enough cards.
No one has ever heard of Jameson Caskmates, so they’ll automatically assume it’s something awesome. Fortunately, that happens to be true so it’s it’s a stellar choice. How many times do you find a liquor at Walgreens that’s aged in barrels from an Irish brewery and tastes like happiness.
Knob Creek Gift Pack
Knob Creek is as close as it gets to an everyday drinker for me, and everyone could use a solid whiskey glass. Plus, it says “Limited Edition” right there on the box so they know it’s special.
It says it right there on the bottle. There’s nothing special about this Absolut, it’s just shinier. We all know that shiny tastes delicious though, so pick up a case or eight.
A Stolen Bottle of 1800 Tequila
Despite their best efforts, security can’t protect all the liquor at Walgreens. There’s always someone who’s willing to swipe a bottle when people are looking the other way. And you know what? More power to them. I hope they’re having a happy hammered holiday.