$30,000 Valentine’s Day Margarita; He Went to Jared Drunk

Funny valentine's day card

Iron Cactus is serving up a Valentine’s Day Margarita complete with diamond earrings hanging from a lime for a mere $30,000.

We’re no strangers to expensive cocktails. Not long ago we sang the praises of two cocktails in Chicago that were pushing $35 a piece and worth every penny. And while this Valentine’s Day Margarita might be worth the money, it’s also the dumbest thing you could ever buy.

Iron Cactus zoltan david valentine's day margarita diamond earringsThe margarita itself is fairly basic – PatrĂ³n Platinum Tequila, Grand Marnier Centenaire, fresh squeezed lime juice, and 100% organic agave Nectar – with the one major upgrade being the Grand Marnier Centenair. That runs nearly $150 per bottle, but as an ingredient that’s less than 30% of the drink, it’s not going to make or break your experience. The real money comes from a pair of dangling earrings with 260 D-color (huh?), flawless diamonds weighing 3.75 carats handcrafted by Zoltan David.

Here’s the problem with this Valentine’s Day Margarita Why would I buy diamond earrings from a Mexican restaurant? Sure, it makes for a very special night and is probably considered romantic by some lunatics out there, but that doesn’t make it a reasonable idea. When people propose by having the engagement ring in a glass of champagne (or whatever cheesy people do), they don’t buy it from the restaurant. They buy it from a jeweler like a normal human being. Diamonds, which aren’t actually rare considering 135,000,000+ carats will be mined this year, are overpriced as is. The last thing you need is to let the restaurant add in a markup for no reason.

The saving grace for the Iron Cactus’ Valentine’s Day Margarita is that they’re donating $6,000 from the price to charity. As a guy who works 8-5 for a non-profit in Chicago, I can appreciate that. It still doesn’t make the whole thing any less ridiculous though.

Colin Joliat
About Colin Joliat 347 Articles
Colin Joliat is the brains behind this rinky-dink operation. He covers the alcohol industry with two parts information, one part comedy, and one part WTF is wrong with this guy. He's written for Brobible, Guyism, Thrillist, CoolMaterial, Craft, and more.